There are many reasons why I love the month of November, including the fact that in my head it's already Christmas season. I'd be amiss, however, to completely skip over Thanksgiving. I know we are called over and over again to be in a state of constant thankfulness, but I have a feeling that I'm not the only one who kind of forgets about it, only to have it be the focus of mostly just November. (I do acknowledge that this is a terrible thing indeed, though!)
Thanksgiving has taken on a new meaning this fall. These past three months have just been...in a strange way, a blessing. I came here with a cold, hostile heart, wondering why God was keeping me at Cedarville, let alone on the earth. July-September was a very dark time for me, darker than it had been for years. But God,
...isn't it always that simple, two-word phrase, "but God?"
But God kept prodding at the lock on my heart, reminding me that I was still that His sensitive little girl, just needing His love and His strength to carry on. And He broke it, though I did not realize it at that exact moment. Once I gave it up, only then did he reveal those He was placing in my life that He knew I could love on, because even though I'm crusty on the outside, He somehow gives me more and more love every day that makes me want to invest in people. And I'm so unbelievably thankful for that.
He removed me from the County so I could realize what He'd given me the past eighteen years of my life, and I pray I will forever live with this newfound thankfulness for those of you I left behind. I have been supported in ways I never thought possible, card after card, package after package...the love overflows and I know it is only because of Him.
The people He has placed in my life here. I'm very intentional about my relationships with others and I like to get to the core of people, and I know that many people are not looking for a friend like that, so I'm thankful for those who have let me in, even if just a little. I only have one person who really has got to know me and my story (love you, Abby!) and vice-versa, but I know there are others out there, so I'm not losing hope. And I'm so blessed to have a group that has taken a chance on me, that I now am able to spend time with on a regular basis, because even though I know I'm not the most interesting character of the bunch, that they still value me. God is faithful. I'm thankful, as well, to have a church that I hopefully will be going to go to on a regular basis, and it's just that small church atmosphere God knows I needed to thrive and miss terribly back home.
Yes, I'm still mighty vulnerable (thankful for all of you who bear with me!!), and while not every day is sunshine and roses... praise God I'll never be the same. And I could not be more thankful.
Laura xx
